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Writer's pictureTheresa Baxter

Yes, this is a poem about poo...


*Illustration reference: Don Purcell


There are disasters of all kind

The natural ones that come to mind

Tornadoes, earthquakes, hurricanes

The chaos that they cause! The pains!

But one that often goes unmentioned

For reasons good, draws no attention

This one’s as natural as can be

Befalls us all, I guarantee

It hits you like a double whammy

The misery known as “poonami”

Exactly as it sounds, it is

And really it’s nobody’s biz

But should it strike, inopportune

A restroom can’t be found too soon!

I mean the best of us get backed up

And the “traffic” in our bowels stacks up

A little help we have to give

In form of gentle laxative

Intestines do the loop de loop

And catapults out all our poop!

I think from this point, what is best

Your imagination do the rest…

I’ll tell you if you suffer so

I wish you well down creek you row

Those waves turn into gentle ripples

Subsides the burn that’s known to cripple

Thus ends the poo catastrophe

And fades to distant memory

Eventually, the normal comes

And order is restored to bums…

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