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Fruitcake be a Christmas staple

But not one found upon my table

It’s so amusing how this “treat”

Became a thing that people eat

Why bakers over this will toil

When purpose is to never spoil

Designed to stand the test of time

Survive in any state or clime

The recipe that most folks use

Heavy spices, soused with booze

Candied fruit and nuts are key

But still won’t make it good to me

I wonder why they call this cake?

This brick of stuffs would better make

A decent doorstop, weight for lifting

In fact I think most are re-gifting

The oldest one that has been found

From ancient Rome, still makes the rounds

I guess there’s good that comes from gifts

That feed us should apocalypse

Drive us to woods where food is scarce

A fruitcake then will answer prayers

Till then I think I’ll pass on plate

Of food without expiry date…

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