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Cocaine Bear



A tale that’s strange as e’re been known Has taken on life of its own

Illicit coke sailed through the air

And created mythic Cocaine Bear

This sweet black bear was once alive

Way back in nineteen eighty-five

Living free, what he loved most

Unbeknownst, he’d soon be toast

For high above a plane too heavy

Would soon disburse illegal levy

Overboard those drugs did go

Fell to the forest far below

Container weighing many pounds

Spread its cargo on the ground

40 packs of pure cocaine

Enough to fry a creature’s brain

Was found by unsuspecting bear

Who decided to, right then and there

Eat every ounce, how could he know?

That that was quite a lot of blow

He ate and ate and ate and ate

All those bags of bootlegged freight

I bet you’ll guess just how this goes

That poor black bear did overdose

But that is not how ends this story

For Cocaine Bear reached further glory

Turns out he got himself quite stuffed

But now with taxidermist’s fluff

That bear lives on, so cute and plucky

From park to mall sat in Kentucky

Was bought and sold, trekked many miles

So that one day, displayed in style

His story spreads like all myths do

Where parts are lore and some are true

His carcass now, though far from woods

Is being used for something “good”

He wears a note for all to see:

Steer clear of drugs, or dead you’ll be!

You might end up in deep despair

Or stuffed like our friend, Cocaine Bear…

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