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Return of The Lisping Jedi

The hooded figure walks with grace

A shadowed darkness hides his face

Long-fingered hands poke from his sleeves

Intense the air feels as he leaves

Where was the place when last was seen?

Traipsed through the sands of Tatooine

What was his mission, what brought him back?

Are evil forces what he tracks?

Approach with caution, his ways are eerie

Yet when he meets you, he’s quite cheery!

Throws back his hood, extends one hand

Claps hard your shoulder with smile quite grand -

“Tho nithe to thee you onths again!

Theemth every year, on thandy plain!

Can’t thstop now, needsth I muthst attend, 

May the fourth be with you, ciao my friend!”

Awww, I remember who this was

So memorable he was! Because

There’s nothing better, I am guessing

Receiving Jedi’s treasured blessing

And though from tongue his howdy trips

I’ll always prize that Jedi’s lisp

For like baptism by holy spittle

You feel reborn, and soaked, a little…

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