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The Modern Gnome



His gravitas is seen for miles

The beard is thick, to hide his smiles

A wrinkled visage worn by weather

Good thing he has treasured sweater

For many years in dirt he’s sat

He wears it well, just like his hat

He’s good luck yet at heart he’s devilish

He’d rather hoard it ‘cause he’s quite selfish

But stands his guard in front of home

The Logan Roy of Garden Gnomes…


He likes the earth, but prefers to wear it

Those muted tones gives outfit merit

Behind dark shades and wide brimmed cap

This little man won’t take your crap

But often he is overlooked

Forgotten by a babbling brook

In contemplation, shoulders hunched

He sits in silence, face all scrunched

How he craves companionship

But messes up, his own feet trip

He always ends up all alone

That Kendall Roy, the Guarded Gnome…


He might be wee, and slightly weird

Eschews the cap and twisty beard

His hair is always done just so

The sharpest elf your garden knows

He’s full of insults, barbed like arrows

His cut of pants is sharp and narrow

He’s tossed around but gets back up

And all good things he will disrupt

But of this group of impish gnomes

We love him most, that rascal Rome!


The pretty one is oh so clever

Disregard her, you should never!

Cherub as if sent from Heaven

And over home she’s guardian

She stands apart for strong is she

Will take her place at base of tree

Surveys the land for sign of strife

Protects the brood, and will for life

She’s fierce in mood and temperament

A heroine cast in cement

The staunchest gnome you can employ

The Garden Goddess, beloved Shiv Roy!


They dot the land like troll procession

Jostling, fighting for succession

The head of line is fading fast

And no one knows who’s first or last

Who will prevail on highest hill

Each takes its place, stands guard until

There’s one remaining all alone

The pinnacle of Modern Gnome…

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